The dominant woman
Why don't men take on the submissive role?
We have realized that many men would never consider taking on the submissive role. Being dominated by a woman. It is almost instinctive to expect the man to be dominant in the relationship, both in bed and outside it. But it is time to break this pattern. When being a dominant person is part of your nature, it can of course feel unfamiliar and perhaps even frightening to give up your dominance to someone else. But what we know today is that letting someone else take control and allowing yourself to let go of control can eventually help your entire nervous system relax.
This is absolutely not something that necessarily happens the first time. But give yourself the chance to explore. Let go of control and simply enjoy, perhaps for once, letting someone else decide & the best part is that it can lead to an incredibly positive change in your sex life.
It can certainly feel difficult to bring up your fantasy of wanting to be dominated by a woman. But if you feel comfortable enough to mention it and it is well received, you can simply get started.
Once you've had the conversation...
If you know your partner and have openly discussed trying BDSM play, what could be better than surprising them with some fun new toys? Starting with handcuffs can be a calm but very exciting beginning. The feeling of not being able to move your hands freely, and of the other person being the only one who can set you free, can create a thrilling and exciting sensation. If you want to use additional toys, you can try a simple feather. Many people are familiar with the feeling of being tickled. It is a mix of pleasure and discomfort. But with the right atmosphere, finding that pleasure in the feather can create an incredibly intense, pulse-raising sensation. Or perhaps you have tried some kind of role-play before. Add a little spanking to the game and explore together.
How you as a woman can take on the dominant role.
How do you take on the dominant role when you do not have the physical advantage?
How do you make the submissive do exactly what you want?
If both of you are on board, it is actually quite simple. BDSM is not just about whipping someone or making the other person feel pain right away. You can tempt him with sexual pleasure and arouse him. Perhaps start the day with some morning pleasure and teasing by going down on him. But do not finish by acting as though there might be more if he is obedient. You can do this on the same day or even over several days to make it a little more difficult, but ultimately worth it.
Here are some tips on how to take on the dominant side, whether you are a beginner or have done this before.
1. It is always important that the other person agrees to what is going to happen.
Send him a text message while he is at work, saying that when he comes home, you are the one in charge. Tell him that his cock is yours and that you will do exactly what you please as soon as he walks through the door.
2. Have you planned your play session?
Good! When taking on a dominant role, it is always helpful to know what your next move is. Searching for toys and making things unnecessarily complicated can ruin your dominant attitude. Be well prepared and go over in your mind what you would like to do with your submissive. Buy some fun items to make it extra exciting and new.
3. To really arouse him, it is helpful to know what he desires.
Does he want to be tied up, or perhaps even have you put a cock cage on him to heighten the sexual tension of being yours? What is often desired as well is a really good outfit. How could he not fantasize about his woman dressed sexily in tights, a corset, and holding a matching whip to complete the look? Play with clothing and accessories to create the full atmosphere for your games.
4. Now it is time to step into your role.
As you wrote in your text message to your submissive, you are waiting for him when he gets home. You are well prepared in the bedroom. When he comes home, you have a cocky, challenging, yet slightly flirtatious attitude. The ropes are secured around the bedposts, and you have hidden the toys within easy reach so that he cannot see what you are going to do to him. It should come as a surprise.
Order him to undress and lie down on the bed. Now you tie him down, and he is yours alone. Be sure to explain the safe words. If he says red, the game stops immediately. If he says yellow, something is on the edge, so proceed carefully or change direction.
Let the game begin! Bring out the ice cubes you placed in a bowl. To deprive him of even more control, you can put a blindfold on him. Give him everything from spanking and tickling to perhaps anal play. Explore and find out what you both enjoy. Nothing is wrong as long as you both consent.